Day in the Life

Since this is my very first blog, I thought I would introduce you all to a day in the life of Ashley Thompson!

5:00 AM: Alarm goes off. SNOOZE

 5:16 AM: Alarm goes off, again. SNOOZE

5:32 AM: Alarm goes off, again. Sigh to self and wonder how much time I have before Charlie starts fussing.

 6:25 AM: Finally ready after trying on 3 different outfits and deciding I have absolutely nothing to wear to work anymore. Tell myself, start making a shopping list for my girls’ trip to Des Moines this weekend.

 6:35 AM: Start working on diaper and clothes for Charlie. All the while I’m watching Kelly, my husband, refill and diaper Genie and think to myself, should I tell him that he is completely WASTING the refills because he tied that knot so large? Nope, I’ll just sit here and judge him quietly.

 6:45 AM: Henry, my son, tries to convince me to let him have ice cream if he does well on his spelling test. “It’s time to go, get in the van.” Secretly hope he doesn’t realize I didn’t answer about the ice cream.

 6:50 AM: Alright, I managed to get both kids with breakfast and, literally, all 7 of my bags for the day in the van. Just as I walk around I remember its Wednesday…RECYLCING.

6:54 AM: After making 3 trips to the curb with recyclables in my heels. I’m finally pulling out of the garage. Pick up Charlie only to discover she is completely wet. Experience mini-meltdown and realize she just spilled her milk on her pants.

 7:30 AM: TIME FOR WORK

 4:50 PM: Stand around parking lot with co-worker complaining about our day and all the annoying people.

5:00 PM: Get in minivan; turn on my “Minivan Bumping” playlist; think to self, remember to go out on 42nd because Edgewood was backed up. AWE! The baby geese hatched……where are they? I have to remember to tell Henry.

5:25 PM: Pull into daycare, glance at Fitbit & see I made it to North Liberty in 20 minutes….yeah I speed, a lot, while listening to rap (judge away).

 5:26 PM: Log kids out of computer as soon as I walk in the door, every minute counts right?! Go to nursery and watch Charlie walking over to the other baby and secretly hope she throws the toy at her or falls on her, either will do!

 5:27 PM: No such luck, so I scoop her up and get her daily report card. Think to self, dang girl you should really sleep more!

5:30 PM: Head outside to get Henry. Open the door and he’s smirking because his teacher saw him throw a ring on the roof (little turd). Proceed, “HENRY JAMES! Let’s go!” Teacher comments on the mention of middle name as another little kid lobs a ring at Henry’s head and nails him. I patiently wait for him to start crying! “Henry lets go, shake it off.” He proceeds to cry more. “Henry, it was a complete accident so man up and shake it off!”

5:35 PM: FINALLY get back inside only to discover Henry has to go upstairs to get his bag. As I wait I ponder, why do I always think I can wait till I get home to pee? Henry finally comes down and we get in the van to go home.

 5:43 PM: It’s Tuesday, so Henry gets $1.99 happy meal. While in drive-thru I notice Charlie is abnormally quiet. She’s asleep, hence the previous thought about sleeping! Take photo (while stopped, of course, and send to Kelly)

5:50 PM: “Oh Henry, guess what! The baby geese at work hatched! I’ll take a picture tomorrow…if I remember!”

 5:51 PM: As we unload from the van, I remind Henry to feed the dog and pray Charlie doesn’t wake up! Made it upstairs without Charlie waking up. Tell myself, just leave her downstairs next time to reduce the risk of her waking. DUH!

5:53 PM: Run to the bathroom as I’m seconds from peeing my pants now and catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror. I wonder, Yikes, is this what I looked like all day?! Time to put on the sweats and tee!

 6:10 PM: CRAP! Charlie is awake. Take her out of car seat and check on daily report to see if I have to actually “mom up”. Diaper 4:40pm ✔ Fed 4:20pm ✔✔ Think to self, how I’m I going to cook with Charlie on my hip?! “Oh look here, a muffin tin and a clothes pin and a paint brush and a hair clip and here, a graham cracker. Now see all this fun stuff Charlie, sit and play while I cook….thanks!”

 6:12 PM: open the fridge to get ingredients and notice I have a full bottle of wine in the fridge. MUST HAVE A GLASS!

 6:30 PM: Kelly’s home and grabs Charlie. (Charlie whining) Kelly tells Charlie, “let me just put my pants on….” LOL – Amateur!

 6:45 PM: (Charlie still whining) Get some beef stew heated up for Charlie. Dang, this is good. Now contemplating whether I should tell Kelly that I’ll just share stew with Charlie…..nah!

 7:00 PM: BATH TIME! Put Charlie in the tub and she looks at me like I’m crazy which reminds me, I need to paint my toe nails. But first, MORE WINE!

 7:10 PM: Kelly brings me dinner while I sit on the bathroom floor watching Charlie and my toes dry.

7:20 PM: Charlie starts freaking out, I think she bit her finger or tongue, so bath time and eating come to a screeching halt. Time to wash up and get out….Henry now wants to know what is for dinner…SERIOUSLY?!

7:35 PM: feeding Charlie and I message my girlfriends that I have only had one glass of wine and I’m already tipsy.

 7:45 PM: Charlie is asleep and Henry starts whining about watching a movie. Clearly, it’s time to go to bed, but I turn on Bernstein Bears while he eats his banana. Wonder, why does a family of bears own a cat? Weird. I look over and Henry is crying, ugh. I ask him if he needs a hug and we hug.

8:30 PM: “OK Henry, time for bed.” Henry trying to delay the inevitable, proceeds to tell me a story about some sleep game he plays. I stop listening and wait for him finish. “Cool. Good night. I love you.”

 8:45 PM: Finish cleaning up the kitchen and bathroom. Done. Thank God. Crap my toes are still a mess and I’m drunk (from my 2 glasses of wine)…..time for bed!!

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